The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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