omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize