shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I feel like death gave me a hand job
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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