Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
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