Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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