Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Randomize
