Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
