just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
