if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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