it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
