let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
