super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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