Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
