Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
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