I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
