Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Randomize
