As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
