4 words: hood of his car
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
