I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
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