I looked at my own cervix.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
