I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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