i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
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