arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
