U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Randomize
