Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
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