Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
