I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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