my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Randomize