You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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