Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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