you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
