i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Come see our sink grown plant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize