...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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