Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize
