i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
