my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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