When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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