he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
