So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
