Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
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