Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
