I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize