Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize