maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
