I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I need a burrito and a hug.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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