i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
don't judge my taste in strippers
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
i think we sleep fucked last night...
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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