that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
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