so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
