Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
