I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize