He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
